I am being interviewed this week by a lovely woman who is writing a book about adoption. She has sent me some questions to think about, and I do my best thinking on the keyboard. Comments very very welcome.
Why are you adopting older children?
Why not? They can walk and talk and play. Yes, we anticipate that we will be doing full-on therapeutic attachment parenting as they know absolutely nothing about belonging to a family, but Attachment Issues can be out-parented, whereas FAS and FAE cannot. With younger children, the risk of FAS/FAE goes up as it is harder to spot the younger the child is. You can't out-parent FAS/FAE.
Also, as infant adoption is seen as the “norm” (this is embedded in your question even), older kids are left to languish in the orphanages. That’s sad. They are not bread that goes stale after awhile. Older kids are as vibrant and attractive to me as are younger kids – moreso perhaps. By way of example, our son Andy threw his arms around my neck and asked (in Russian) “Is it true!? Is it true!?” He doesn’t know how to be a family kid, but he sure does know that he want to be one. Babies really don’t celebrate their new families in the same way.
Oh, yes, and diapers. No diapers.